Sunday, April 11, 2010

Dialogue part II

(warning, contains foul language, and disturbing images)

J -yes we are scanning our sector Sgt

Sgt V -Well, don't get too caught up discussing all this stuff, remember that you have to pay attention to what's going on around you. That's why you're here.

A -Aye Aye Sgt.

Sgt V -Very well, carry on

---V leaves-----

A -anyway, back to your question Cpl. Would Jesus agree with my actions? The answer is yes because he knows that I am doing this for a just reason. It is for a just cause and I am doing my best.

J -so then you agree with me? there are no absolutes moral rules, it depends on the situation.

A -well...I don't know, he did say thou shall not kill, but then, the army of Israelites did some killing in their day.

J -so you feel like a good Christian, then?

A -I don't know, listen you are changing the topic, I wanted to know why you are an atheist, how can you not believe in God?

J -how can you believe in God, after all we've been trough.

A -Precisely because he has protected you and me, my faith in him has grown, my prayers are being heard.

J -see? that's the most disgusting thing I have ever heard.

A -Why? believing in God has given me the strength to get trough these hard times.

J -I mean, really? Do you think that your alive because somehow you are more special than Sgt Adams, or Lt Ski who got shot or blown up? Do you think that you matter more, or you were more pleasing to God and that's why he spared you? Lt Ski was a devout Christian, and he is gone. I am an atheist and I am still alive. What about all the orphans running around in this place? This is fucking shithole, and you sit here saying that it's ok because God is in control. You tell me this and I think about what happened last week.

A -the vehicle incident?

J -yes, the vehicle incident.

A -is that what made you an atheist?

J -no, that's not why, but, supposing there was a God, why? why would he allow that to happen? That car that ran trough our traffic check point, we had to no choice but to shoot it, we freaking lit up that car Ali, and at the end, what? There was a family there, no weapons, no bombs, just a car, with a Dad, a Mom, a ten year old girl, a baby. We saw it Ali, we saw the bodies, we did nothing illegal, we were following our orders, we were protecting the compound against a real threat and yet, goddamit, we have the blood of these Iraqis in our hands. Why did your God allow that happen? What kind of fucking twisted sick God allows that to happen, why is that some kind of test? does he really have no disregard of the innocent? What are you going to tell me? That everything is going to make sense in the end? Well no! I want nothing to do with your God, if he's in charge of this joint, and he's real, I am not going to kiss his ass. I spit on his image, I curse his name for putting us through this.

A -But Corporal, we have free will. What happened is not God's fault. It was only humans that got us in this mess.

J -yes, but they, I mean, they ran a traffic point, who knows why, and then they got shot. Crap, you are telling me that he intervenes to keep you alive, but doesn't intervene to save an innocent family, something doesn't make sense. You are right, I do think that it's only us, there is no way that a just, all knowing, all powerful god would allow these things to happen. There is just no way, and if it's true, and if this is all some part of some kind of plan, then he can take this world, his lofty plan and shove it! I want nothing to do with this kind of God.

A -so you somehow think that you know more than God. You need to bad to appreciate the Good.

J -at what expense? don't you care? look at all the people who are dying, who are starving, who are losing their family? and you still talk about a plan? does this make sense to you?

A -you can't make sense of everything, you are a small creature with a small brain, trying to comprehend this world.

J -so none of this bothers you. I bugs me to even conceive of something that could intervene, could save us, and you are telling me that he cares, he loves us, and allows us to live this way. I need to chill out, stop talking for a bit.


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